LiberalsMustDie.com

Christmas is here!!!

Do you know what that means? I hope so. Because if you don't know the true meaning of Christmas, then you are going to be going to hell!!

Lots of people think they know about Christmas and what it means to be a good person, but you would be suprised how many of these same "good" people believe that you should treat homosexuals as equals. A direct offense to God!

So on this Christams day, I will provide you a quick Christmas quiz to see if you are on the path to heaven, or HELL!

Take the Christmas Quiz, just after the jump.

Here are a few questions. These should be very easy, so if you don't know the answer to any of these, you are probably on a path directly to Hell.

If you DO get a question wrong, skip down to the bottom to learn what you can do to help save your soul.

Question 1)  Why does Christmas fall so close to the Winter Solstice?
Answer: Jesus is God, and as God he can pick what day is gets born on!  So he decided to be born during the Pegan winter celebrations, so he could ruin their Winter Solstice holiday and claim it as Christmas.

Question 2)  Why do you have to buy gifts on Christmas?
Answer:  Jesus was a champion of the poor!  The poor benifit from gift giving in many ways.  First, they are likely to get a gift that they otherwise couldn't afford!  Bonus! 

Second, and more importantly, if everyone spends a lot of money, it will help the economy, which will help business owners, who will be able to hire more poor people to do things like clean their houses, and mow their lawns!  Double Bonus!

Question 3)  What time should you attend Church on Christmas?
Answer:  The only acceptable time to attend Church is the "Midnight Mass." 

Now, lots of Churches are starting to have their Midnight Mass earlier, like 9pm.  So long as it is called "Midnight Mass," and you attend, no matter what time it actually is, God will be happy, and your family will not be punished.

Question 4)  How are Santa Claus and Jesus related?
Answer:  Jesus met Saint Nick (aka Santa Claus) in Heaven and asked him to carry presents that he makes in his shop in the North Pole to all the good Christian children of the world.

Question 5)  Does Santa deliver to Muslums or Atheists?
Answer:  Of course not!! Are you crazy?  He might as well drop off some presents to the Devil and his Demons.

Question 6)  Do you have to decorate your house for Christmas?
Answer:  Only if you want to go to heaven!  Jesus views the number of lights you use as a measure of your faith in Him!

Question 7) Can you give a Christmas present to a Jewish person?
Answer:  No way!  Would you give a present on Hitler day to a Jewish person?  No!  It's the same thing!  Think about it... think hard.

Question 8)  Is it acceptable to say "Happy Holidays"?
Answer:  In no way is it ever acceptable to say "Happy Holidays" instead of "Merry Christmas." 

Jesus demands your respect!  Saying happy holidays is like bitch slapping Jesus in the face and calling him your bitch! 

Jesus is no pussy, and he won't stand for this!  This is not a time for turning the other cheek.  He will rise up and kick your ass!!



Did you get all the questions right?  If so, you can click here to leave the site, knowing that you are wonderful and a good Christian!


If you failed any of the questions, then you need to start reading here.

You are clearly on the path to hell.  Is that what you want?  Do you want to be tortured for eternity in hell fire?

There is only 1 way to save your soul. 

First, take 25% of your annual salary and send it to your local evangelical church.  

Second, take 25% of your annual salary, and send it to the Republican National Committee.

Third, take 25% of your annual salary, and send to via paypal.com.

Finally, take the remaining 25%, and spend it on Christmas presents to help our economy.

If and only if you follow these steps can you have a chance of being saved!