Well, color me embarassed. All this time I had been "let's invade Iraq" this, "let's nuke Iran that", "lets turn the middle east into a giant sheet of glass," for 1 reason: I wanted Armegeddon to start ASAP, and for that to happen, we need some crazy foreigners to get into a nuclear war with us.
Now, it looks like I might have been targeting the wrong evil crazy foreigners!
President Musharraf, President and General of Pakistan, has announced that he will step down as General if he wins the upcoming election.
Now, what does this mean for us, you might ask.
Well, let me tell you a little about Pakistan. First, they have tons of nukes. I am not sure how they got their nukes, but I think the Democrats gave them a whole bunch back in the 80s just to piss off Vice President George Bush. Second, they (except for Musharraff) hate America more than even the readers of DailyKos.com! I mean, Bin Laden is running his local Obama 08 campaign out of Pakistan right now, so that gives you an idea of how much these guys hate America.
So why is this a good thing? Simple, as soon as they get a new General, he will probably start giving the nukes to terrorists, who will detonate them. A quick "investigation" will show that the Democrats and Pakistan are to blame. We will then nuke them into a million pieces, but not before they kick off some of their nukes at some of our allies. Our allies will respond, and pretty soon we will all be nuking each other: BINGO: ARMEGEDDON!!!
I can't wait to see the look on the faces of those people who thought Bush was a "failure" when he is able to bring back Jesus! Single handedly I might add!
So, how do you know when the rapture will happen?
Here is a hint, it will look like this:
Bring on the War, Bring on the Rapture, Bring on Jesus!!
Oh, and vote Republican in 08 or you will be left behind when the rapture comes!